"Yes. You need to lighten up. A bit."

I have a friend who doesn't conceal the truth from me. Ever. If I need a "cut to the bone" answer about something, I usually confide in him as he is the source of most truthful wisdom. Not to say he has not been wrong before, but even Oprah and Madonna mess up from time to time. So when I was feeling as if I might be a little uptight, I asked him.

"Do you think I'm uptight?" He responded with the above answer, and then smiled. "But just a bit." I knew there that he was lying.

Since I went through this whole mind/body/spirit transformation during my last years in San Francisco, I have believed myself to be a pretty open and free individual. Before then, I had a problem with anxiety, and I didn't find any reason to trust others' intentions. But feeling that I have now moved beyond that, I haven't seen myself of late as an "uptight" guy in need of loosening. However recently, I have begun to see how tense I get in certain situations, and that I get very easily wound up when I have to face a situation where my nerves are rattled. And it sucks, because I don't want to be that guy. I like the idea that I have recently had of me best - the Angel who's all chill and confident. Not this crazy who needs to "loosen up. A bit."

In all reality, I am going to be thirty next year, and I don't want to end my twenties a ball of pent-up emotional anxiety. See, I realize that a lot of my frustrations stem from my lack of emotional control. Or perhaps my attempts at trying to over-control my emotions. Perhaps it is all of this self-analysis that causes me to be so crazy. Or it could all just be from the fact that I haven't had sex in far too long to remember. I don't know. What I do know is that letting go and laughing is one of my favorite things to do. Dancing helps me relax. Working out in general. I love a good glass of wine and a chat (which I have planned for tonight - yay!) And just letting my body breathe.

I just need to let my body breathe. Stretch. Shake. And then let it go.

And stop thinking so much.

Trust my process and have faith.

And maybe get laid.

What about it?